I know I have only been alive for 19 years, but here are some lessons I have learned along the way that I thought are important to share. Make sure you comment below some of the most important lessons you have learned during this crazy thing that we call life!
1. It’s okay to sometimes not be okay-Constantly pretending everything is okay all the time can be exhausting. Trust me, I learned this one from experience. Concealing everything with a smile is not suddenly going to make everything go away. Eventually, a smile will lose meaning and it will no longer make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside like it’s supposed to. If you need to vent or grieve or channel your anger, it is okay to do that every once in awhile. Find different ways to channel your anger or grief. I have always found writing and singing (even though I sound like a dying whale) therapeutic, what are some ways you guys like to channel your anger?
2. Learn to be okay with your own company-It is so important to learn to be able to be happy when you are by yourself. People are great to be around, but at the end of the day the one person you can always count on is yourself. Fostering independence within yourself is a skill that will be of utmost value to your future.
3. That being said, people are not always bad-Not everyone is out to get you. This is one I still struggle with. Best friends are actually there to be best friends and to listen. More often than not, many of our frustrations can be solved by simply just talking to someone and letting them know what’s going on. Opening up to someone you trust at first can feel a bit scary, but after awhile it will come more naturally and it will feel as if a weight has been lifted off your chest. Now I am not saying go tell your deepest darkest secrets to some stranger on the street, but rather to abstain from the feeling that no one is there for you. I liked to conceal everything I was dealing with because I thought letting others in would burden them.However, lately I have been trying harder to open up more and it has shocked me how supportive people are. At the end of the day, you realize the people who really care about you will take the time to listen.
4. Don’t let this world make you bitter-Bad stuff is going to happen. It always does and it is inevitable. People you thought you could trust are going to screw you over, you may lose a loved one, family/friends may let you down, but at the end of the day this is a part of life no one can escape from. Either you can dwell on every single problem that has come your way, or you can choose to look past them and grow from these experiences.I don’t know about you, but the latter seems to be a much more appealing option to me.
5. “Sometimes when things are falling apart, they may actually be falling into place”-Everything gets better. It may take time, but even the darkest of times will pass and you will come out stronger. So hang in there, warrior.
6. Nothing is going to happen unless you work for it-The only way to turn your daydream into a reality is to work for it. It is not enough to dream about your future job. You need to go out and take advantage of opportunities, such as internships, and work towards that job. Having dreams is great, but making dreams a reality is even better.The only person in charge of your future is you.
7. Bad things happen to good people-This is probably the hardest lesson I have had to learn. As the child of a parent who has been chronically ill for ten years, it’s hard not to question why horrible things happen to the best people. Maybe it is because they are the strongest and have the ability to get through struggles, or maybe it is just a fact of life. But whatever the reason, if you’re someone who has ever wondered why bad things happen to good people, I want you to know you are not alone. I wonder the same thing every time my dad is going through a tough time. I have tried my best to come to terms with the fact that bad stuff happens, but it is how we deal with it that makes us stronger.
*side note: Do any of you live with or know someone who is chronically ill? How do you deal with this and what is it like for you? This is something I really want to write a blog post about because I always have trouble finding people who connect with me on a similar level. It is also really personal and I am not sure if I am ready to open up just yet. But please let me know in the comments below if you can relate. I would really like to know!
8. Self confidence is key- This is something I still struggle with everyday, but I have realized how important it is to master the art of self confidence. Whether it be in class, the workplace or your personal life, self confidence is always important. Being confident shows people that your opinion matters, and that you are capable and able to get by on your own. I have been through a multitude of jobs by the age of 19, and I realized self confidence is important in every single one. My jobs ranged from interning at the state’s attorney’s office to being a waitress at a country club, and no matter how different these jobs are, self confidence is so important in order to succeed in either one.
9. “Don’t let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game”-Take risks. And by risks I don’t necessarily mean skydive off a plane (although, if that’s something you’re into you should totally do it!), but rather take risks in your daily life. Maybe for you taking a risk means striking up a conversation with the boy in your class who you have been crushing on, or finally applying for that job you have had your eye on. Whatever it is, even taking the smallest risk could have the biggest impact on your life. Who knows, that boy you start talking to could end up being the man you marry, and that job you apply to may be one of the best decisions you ever make. At the end of the day, taking risks in your daily life is absolutely worth it. If you succeed that’s great, and if you don’t at least you know you tried.
10. When it comes to friends, quality is more important than quantity-I cannot begin to stress how important this is. Having one million fake friends is nothing in comparison to having one really good friend. At the end of the day, the people who are there for you and who genuinely care for you, are your close friends. Having a few people who actually want the best for you is so much more important than having a bunch of people who do not even really know you. At the end of the day, it is so important to surround yourself with your cheerleaders and teammates, and not just noise.
11. Happiness is a choice-This is definitely the most important thing I have learned in my 19 years of life. If you want to be happy, you have to choose to live life with a mindset that things will get better and that bad times will pass on. You also have to teach yourself to see the good in people. If we live life dwelling on all the bad things that have happened to us and all the people who we believe have done us wrong, we will never truly be happy. Rather, it is learning to come to terms with all we have been through and having hope that all will be well soon. If we choose to live life with a positive mindset we will be happier, and I do believe for a fact that happiness is contagious. I don’t know about you, but I would much rather live my life with the positive outlook that all will get better, rather than dwell on every bad thing that has happened in the past.
~~~~Your 19 year old Dreamer ❇️